by Rada Dengar
110226.2200
After Chateau and Beer
-=Personal Quarters of Rada Dengar and Wren Elton=-
110226.2200
After Chateau and Beer
-=Personal Quarters of Rada Dengar and Wren Elton=-
Wren quietly sighed, worried by what she was seeing and more so by what she was feeling. In spite of the general cheer about the ship today, there was something strange in the mood of one Angosian.
She slowly approached Rada from behind. He was quiet today, even for him. It wasn’t sadness, as such, though. She couldn’t place it that easily.
He was however exceptionally contemplative, as time and again he would flick arbitrarily though the pages of his book, read a little, then flick through again.
It seemed like he was searching for something without knowing quite what it was.
“You know you’ve barely put that thing down since we found it,” she said, leaning in over his shoulder and causing him to jump slightly as he was pulled out of the internal world of his thoughts. “Maybe it’s time to give it a rest…”
He looked up at her, a little startled. Slowly he recovered and exhaled. He realised she was right.
He snapped the book shut in one hand then placed it down. Yet he couldn’t help but to continue to stare. His fingers never left it as it rested on the table before them.
Wren moved around to sit on the couch beside him, gently taking his hand in hers and away from the book. He could see the concern in her eyes, and she could see that he just wanted to pick it up again.
She hated seeing him like this.
“Have you figured out who sent it yet?” she asked, picking it up herself and rubbing her thumb over the hard cover.
“It must have been someone in my family,” he suggested, without any real certainty. “I still can’t figure out though why they wouldn’t have left their name…”
“Maybe…maybe you should just try contacting them.”
“And ask about it?”
She nodded but it was clear he didn’t want to do that. Rada merely sighed, shaking his head in response.
Without even really thinking about it, he picked up the brown paper that the book had come wrapped in off the table and began to examine it in his spare hand. Seeing how uncomfortable he was, Wren squeezed the hand she still held.
She could tell he wanted to talk but that he didn’t really know about what.
“So…The Three-sided Square...” She read the title aloud. “You said it was Angosian?”
“Yes, it’s a very old and well-known children’s story…”
Wren simply watched him patiently as he sat the paper down, knowing he wanted to say more.
“It’s about, somewhat ridiculously, this…anthropomorphic square who sets out to leave Square Town to see the world. After a frightening encounter with a rather grumpy circle, he ends up in Triangle City. Everything’s a triangle there. The windows are triangles. The boats are triangles. Well, you get the idea.”
Wren nodded that she did and Rada continued with just the slightest hint of sadness entering into his tone.
“Of course he doesn’t fit. He can’t get in through the triangle shaped doors. He’s uncomfortable in a triangle shaped house. Besides, the triangles don’t like him very much. Eventually though he begins to belong.”
“They accept him?”
“He thinks so. Everything starts to seem easier. Only then he catches sight of his reflection in a shop window. That’s when he realises that his top has begun to be squished in by being forced through triangle shaped doors. He’s beginning to become a triangle. He knows then that he has to go home…”
Rada stopped, sighing. Wren could tell he was intending to remain silent.
“Was it a favourite of yours as a child, or…?”
Rada shook his head that it wasn’t as he picked the book up again. “I’d heard of it but it was never particularly significant to me.”
“So then why would your family want to send it?”
Rada’s eyes filled with fear as a possibility occurred, causing Wren to hold his hand even tighter.
“Maybe…maybe they know.”
“Know what?”
Rada paused and shifted awkwardly, clearly not wanting to put this into words.
“What I’ve done,” he finally answered. “What I’ve become.”
Wren’s eyes opened wider.
“Hold on,” She immediately objected, having thought they were past this. “You did what you did to save my life. You…”
Rada smiled slightly sadly at her, contemplating how to explain this. “What I did, what I now remember doing, was a very horrible thing. I’ll always have to live with it. However I’d done many things one of my people should never do before that. I’d changed a lot to even be in that position in the first place. Starfleet; this life we lead, it’s not the Angosian way.”
“No, it’s not,” Wren answered, taking the book from him and placing it back upon the table. “But that doesn’t mean you’ve changed. If you’d been content to do things the Angosian way, I don’t think you’d have ever left.”
“You’re right, I guess,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. “I never did quite fit in there either.”
“You fit in here,” she assured him.
“I fit with you and with Tam,” Rada replied with a slight smile. “I wouldn’t have even come close to fitting in here though when I first left home.”
Wren was surprised by hearing him speak of Angosia III like this.
“You know, I don’t think I’ve ever heard you refer to where you grew up as home before.”
“I haven’t thought of it as home in a long time,” he admitted. “I still don’t. I’ve just been thinking now of how it used to be. I once belonged there and the rest of the galaxy seemed so strange. I’m quite different now though.”
“I didn’t know you then. But I think that if you could speak to your old self, he’d be pleased with how you ended up. Anyone would have to be.”
“I almost did,” Rada answered. “On Earth, I saw a young man. I could tell he was Angosian and, Wren, he was so much like a younger version of me. It was frightening.” Rada paused and closed his eyes, just trying to grasp how much had changed in him. “He had so much innocence I’ve lost.”
“I’ve known you a long time now,” Wren replied. “I don’t think you’ve lost anything. You’ve gained a lot though.”
“Yeah, well I know that’s not how they’d see it,” Rada said, turning to look now at her and contemplating just how good she was to him. “They’d think I’ve just changed to be more like the people out here. I think this book is someone’s way of telling me it’s time to go home.
“Do you want to go back?”
Rada immediately shook his head. “I don’t belong there anymore. Besides, I wouldn’t know what to say to any of them after all this time.”
“You are starting to miss Angosia though, aren't you?”
“No, I…” Wren gave him a look that reminded him who he was talking to. “It’s just this time of year. The ship tends to take on a very human, Christmas feeling. It reminds me how far away I am from where I began. I miss not feeling that.”
“Well, are you sure you don’t want to go back there?” Wren prompted him, just wanting to make it better.
“I’m sure,” Rada answered without certainty, though certainly with fear at the prospect. He looked to the book again. “First, I just really have to figure out who sent this…”
Lt. Commander Rada Dengar
Chief Engineering Officer
USS Serendipity NCC-2012
Chief Engineering Officer
USS Serendipity NCC-2012