by Lt. Lara Valera Ryn and Jariel Camen
90806.2300
After Thrust Upon
-=USS Serendipity=-
90806.2300
After Thrust Upon
-=USS Serendipity=-
Jariel Camen paused for a moment, after Salvek dismissed all those assembled, to watch the crew. He was worried about them, he had to be, it was part of his duties. No doubt he and Tryst would have their hands full as some went through the difficult task of adjusting to a new Captain.
They all knew, trusted and respected Salvek, but there was always fear where it came to “working for a new boss.”
He focused on one specific person, who sort of awkwardly filled in between two groups of personnel talking amongst themselves as they moved off. Not really with either group, but just trying to blend in with the crowd.
“Coming?” Fleur asked. She had noted how many were moving towards the café, and was somewhat anxious herself to get there first so she could help in Wren’s absence.
“I’ll be a long soon.” Camen said.
Fleur nodded, patted his cheek gently in farewell, and moved off with the flow of people.
Jariel moved with uncharacteristic stealth through the groups and to the person he had observed moments ago. All the while excusing and pardoning himself as he slipped around people and between them when they managed to occupy the whole width of the corridor from side to side.
“Hi,” He began, as he came up along side Lieutenant Ryn. She looked up rather slowly, as if wondering if the greeting was actually meant for her and if she would look foolish for acknowledging it. When she recognized Jariel’s face and the fact he was indeed speaking to her, she replied rather simply.
“Hi.”
“I’ve been away for a bit, and you’ve just completed your first mission here. I just thought I’d check in and see how you are adjusting.”
"Thanks," she replied, and then added, "Everything around here has just been short of normal since day one. I thought I'd find that disconcerting, but it has actually been rather comforting."
"It's good to hear that you are adjusting to life on a Starship," Jariel stated as the two of them walked out of the room and slowly meandered down the corridor together.
Lara laughed softly. "No, I don't think I would be doing quite the same on any other ship in the fleet. There is just something about this place, something that tells me this ship and this crew are just a bit off kilter."
"Then it appears that you are fitting in quite well."
Lara looked over at Jariel. He had spoken his words, softly, seriously, and with conviction. But when she looked over at him, she knew while the sentiment was sincere, he was jesting, and despite everything else around him, the comment and his demeanor provided a well-needed and well-respected distraction.
He felt the last comment needed an explanation, lest she think he was saying she fit in because there was something wrong with her.
“Look, Lara, I’ve never seen a more diverse group of individuals in my life. I’ve been in environments before aboard starships, and certainly on Bajor, where no matter who you thought yourself to be, you were forced into a particular mold, whether that be Starfleet officer or Bajoran Vedek. Everyone here is expected to follow orders and perform their duties, but the understanding is that we are all different, and no one knows the right or wrong way to go about a task. That’s probably what feels so different about this ship as compared to every other you’ve been on.”
“Do you think that will continue?”
The question was obviously referring to Salvek. Vulcan captains were not well renowned for their abilities to accept different opinions or ways of doing things.
“I think Salvek has seen what this crew can accomplish when faith is put into the people. I trust that he will take that into consideration when he work makes decisions aboard this ship.”
They walked in silence for a moment, Jariel very much curious about something else and trying to picture how he would ask such a question to February without offending her. All the while knowing February and Lara may both be joined female Trills, but different in so many ways as individuals.
“How is Ryn adjusting to all this? Not the ship I mean, the joining.”
Jariel winced internally, hoping the answer was not something like. “We can’t stand each other, but thanks for asking.”
"You know, you're the first person to ask me that question."
"Really?" Although she appeared to have taken no offense at his question, he was still cautious with his tone.
"Yeah. Everyone always asks how I am doing. But no one has ever asked me about it, as if it were supposed to be something separate from me."
Something in her answer emboldened him to press forward with this issue. "You almost sound surprised to speak of the Ryn symbiont as something separate from you."
"It's inside of me and has made itself at home. So it's a part of me.”
“You know Dabin Reece had the advantage of time when it came to his joining. Even so it was an awkward experience being joined. I think if you asked him today he would not tell you Reece was a part of him, but rather that Dabin Reece was a distinct individual. Do you think you’ll come to accept yourself not just as Lara and the symbiont Ryn, but as Lara Valera Ryn, the individual?”
Lara smirked at the question. “You speak almost in riddles. I half expected you to offer me the secrets of true inner harmony.”
“Sorry, I realize the question is more philosophical in nature than anything else, but I don’t know how else to ask it.” Jariel pressed the call button on the turbolift they had finally reached, letting everyone else pass them up in the corridor to go first. The lift had just departed with about a half dozen crewmembers, so it would take another minute or two before it could return.
“Or have you already?” Jariel expanded on his previous question, wondering if she did in fact see herself as an individual already.
"I've come to terms with the fact that it is inside me, and it will guide me, so to speak, and give me the experiences of the other hosts, should I want that information." She paused for a second and scrunched her nose while thinking. "Truth be told, it does assert itself. Otherwise, I cannot explain why I ordered Hasperat and Springwine for dinner the other night." Lara looked at Jariel and smiled. "Because I have never been to Bajor."
Seeing she did not want to answer his question directly, or that she did not want to recognize that she was evading it, Jariel tried a different tactic. "Did you like it?"
"The food?"
Jariel nodded.
"Yes, it tasted good, and was somewhat familiar."
"So you lost nothing of your own identity in enjoying something that someone else once cherished."
"You make it sound as if I simply tried a new dish because a friend suggested it to me, not because I was craving it."
The turbolift came and the doors slid opened. Jariel gestured for her to enter and then followed. He was going to ask her where she wanted to go, but for the moment, just set a location that would take them on a slightly longer route to his destination. "That is one way of looking at it."
"Yeah, but tell me this: when was the last time you had such a craving? And besides," she added, not giving him a chance to answer her question, "there was also something inside of me telling me that there was more to the story than simply craving a certain meal."
“Last year we encountered an alien race. They let me see memories of another life I had long since forgotten. Lara, to be honest, it terrified me. Everything I believed myself to be was called into question on a moments notice.”
“Who’s counseling who now?” Lara asked, with a Vulcan like raised eyebrow.
“Sorry. My point was, I know how it feels, to a certain extent, to have cravings as you put it, that weren’t there days or weeks ago. And you are right, there will be much more to the story. Perhaps it was a person you were with when you had the meal, or a key event in one of yours host’s lives that occurred that day. Something so special or important that you remembered that meal above all others. There is quite literally an entire text on the history of Ryn unfolding within you.”
Jariel was guessing if there was ever a way to make her feel excited about having Ryn, that tying it into history would be it.
"You're right, there is. But it is not my life. It is not my history. I am nothing more than the next chapter in the life of this symbiont, and to some extent, that makes me feel empty. Like my life has little meaning outside of gaining new experiences for this thing."
Jariel nodded his head slowly. "That is one way to look at it." He paused for a few seconds, and then added, "But did you ever stop to think that the Ryn symbiont owes you its life. Had you not been there, it would have died. And with it, all of those memories. Instead, now it has the chance to repay you, to provide you with a wisdom and an insight into life that only comes with experience."
"Are you trying to say that this is the symbiont's way of saying 'thank you'?"
There was a soft smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he repeated, "That is one way to look at it."
**********************************
Lara Valera Ryn
Science Officer
USS Serendipity NCC-2012
and
Jariel Camen
Ship’s Chaplain
USS Serendipity NCC-2012
Lara Valera Ryn
Science Officer
USS Serendipity NCC-2012
and
Jariel Camen
Ship’s Chaplain
USS Serendipity NCC-2012