by Lair Kellyn
90528.1730
Following Space Ghosts
-=/\=-
Soundtrack: No Line on the Horizon, by U2
-=/\=-
-=USS Alchemy=-
90528.1730
Following Space Ghosts
-=/\=-
Soundtrack: No Line on the Horizon, by U2
-=/\=-
-=USS Alchemy=-
Commander Lair Kellyn clenched her teeth together so tightly that her jaw instantly began to throb. She replayed the voice of Zanh Liis in her head, as the Serendipity's Captain had asked her if she was clear as to her orders.
She was perfectly clear.
That didn't mean that she agreed with them in the least.
Very slowly she lowered herself down into the command chair at the center of the bridge. Her hands tightened, and she sank her fingernails into the armrests to the point of risking puncture to the leather upholstery.
As everyone present waited on her expectantly, at last she managed to choke out only three tightly strangled words.
"Take us out."
"Aye, Commander." Gira Lassiter replied as she brought the helm to life. "Coordinates set for a transwarp jump as soon as we're clear of the Serendipity."
Kellyn lowered her head and raised it again in acknowledgment.
Dane Cristiane, who was manning the tactical station, shot a look to Gira. He had seen many degrees of what he could call 'pissed off' in his time. As it happened, he himself had lived in a continual state at the top of the charts measuring that particular emotion for most of his life.
He had also known Zanh Liis for several years by now. He knew pissed off when he saw it.
He had never seen anyone quite as pissed off as Lair Kellyn was today.
Micah Samson simply sighed as he set about reading scans that were at best confusing and at worst completely useless. The readings in this area of space were unlike anything he'd seen before.
Moments passed in tomb-like silence as Lair's eyes seemed to burn holes in the forward viewscreen. At last, Lassiter gently cleared her throat.
"We're ready to initiate the transwarp drive, Commander Lair, upon your order."
"Stand by." Kellyn rose and walked to the engineering station. She looked over the readings and then tapped her badge.
"Bridge to Halliday."
[Happy to be of service, Commander. What can I do for-]
"Just tell me that you've double checked and we're ready to go to transwarp." Lair interrupted, with even less than her normally low level of tolerance for the ebullient Terran engineer.
[Triple checked, actually. I mean, I know that it violates the number one rule of engineering efficiency, but I just thought-]
"Thank you, Jamie. Lair out." She sighed a quick, forceful puff of air and spun the heel of her boot toward Lassiter. "Initiate."
"Aye, Sir." Gira's hands flew over the helm and the ship's engine began to hum in a higher pitched tone.
Lair closed her eyes and listened. By listening, even more than by looking, she could tell if it was out of calibration or if everything was precisely tuned.
Satisfied that everything sounded as though it was in order, she sat down at the engineering station and continued monitoring the temperature of the transwarp core.
She was much more in her element at this station than in the command chair, anyway.
Moments later the whirring slowed and then stopped, as the ship completed the cycle and resumed travel at standard warp.
"Time until we intercept the Gauntlet?" Lair asked.
"Actually we...just missed them." Gira announced, biting her lip. "We overshot them a little. Adjusting course to compensate. We should be able to hail them shortly."
"The sooner the better." Lair grumbled, even as a small voice inside of her repeated the same sentence again and again: This is not going to go well...
She looked up as she heard the doors to the turbolift open. Vedek Jariel stepped out and approached her.
"All is well up here?"
"Just peachy." Kellyn growled softly; a phrase she had picked up from years of associating with Dabin Reece. The way she said it, which was the same way that he said it, made it sound as offensive as the most elaborate Klingon profanity ever conceived of.
And the Klingons, like the Bajorans, knew their profanity.
"Happy to hear it." Jariel said with a warm smile, for the sake of the rest of the crew but also because he hoped to remind her that not all was lost yet. If he had learned one thing about Lair over the years it was her tendency to always assume that the worst was going to happen.
Of course he also knew her well enough to realize that this had only become the case after the experiences of her life had proven the point by beating her naturally occurring, childhood optimism out of her. Literally.
He was a child of war, but Kellyn was a child of the Resistance. That brought with it a weight and a history that he could hardly begin to fathom. Sometimes, he honestly didn't know how she carried it.
"Can I have a word with you privately, Commander?"
"Jariel," Kellyn lowered her voice, her eyes shifting slightly. She didn't have time for a sermon.
"Please."
The way he spoke the word was far more effective than if he'd grabbed and twisted her arm behind her, and so Kellyn rose and stepped just out of earshot of the rest. "You have something to say, Vedek Jariel?"
"Just that..." Jariel put a hand on her shoulder and squeezed gently. "If there's anything I can do to help."
"Thank you. But I think we've got it all covered up here. You can go back to...what was it you were doing?"
"I was checking on February. She was quite upset about the evacuation. She's resting in Sickbay. Her blood pressure was elevated, the LMH is watching her closely."
"Not as elevated as mine was when it took her so long to board this ship." Lair had trouble feeling a lot of sympathy for Grace at the moment. Everyone had problems of their own- and she didn't have time for a front row seat for the pregnant diva follies at the moment. "Are the children all right?"
"Tam Elton is understandably distraught. He seemed uncomfortable when I tried to talk to him about his mother though, so I thought it best to let Fleur take over and try to distract him for now. She has the children assembled in the galley, working on some art projects."
"Good. Could you, tell Arie," Lair's words caught at the back of her throat as she tried to enunciate them.
"I'll tell her that you're working very hard up here so that we can all go back home soon." Jariel lowered his eyes, and turned toward the lift. "Remember, if I can help,"
"Thanks."
Then he was gone, and Kellyn sank once again into the center seat and contemplated how she was going to take the sketchy information that had been entrusted to her to deliver to the Admiral and turn it into a convincing enough argument to get Lassiter to authorize calling in the Calvary.
Her thoughts drifted back to the Serendipity. She wondered if Salvek was back aboard or if he was still in command of the empty Zenith. She wondered about Wren's condition, and wished that she hadn't had to leave at a time when she was certain that Rada needed her friendship more than ever.
She thought of Reece, how he must be going out of his mind with his wife and unborn daughter being sent off without him even having a chance to offer reassurance that they'd be together again soon.
Of course, any such reassurances would only be empty wishes; hopeful thoughts and prayers without any substance; most of which may very well depend upon her own ability to convince Lassiter that something was very wrong, and making it right again was going to take nothing short of a miracle.
She had no idea how much time had passed when she became aware of someone calling her name. Repeatedly.
She blinked and looked up. "What is it, Cristiane?"
"I have the Gauntlet on subspace. They want to know why you wish to speak to the Admiral. Apparently she's sleeping."
"Tell them that I'm here on behalf of Zanh Liis, and that if Admiral Lassiter wants any chance of seeing her son again, she had better listen to what I have to say."
-=/\=-Guest Quarters, USS Gauntlet=-
In dreaming, her mind skipped from event to event; all things that had taken place in a year long gone.
A patchwork of images overlapped and melted together. Flooding her consciousness at once, making any one scene all but impossible to isolate from the others.
The investigation.
The truth, revealed.
Then there was the sound of his voice, ringing in her head with perfect clarity as if he were still standing before her.
"Gem, if we do this you might regret it tomorrow."
The whispering echo of his words was followed by a similarly familiar, far yet near sound. That of her own words of reply, reverberating somewhere deep inside of her and resonating just as they had that night all those years ago when everything changed.
"If we don't, I'll regret it for the rest of my life."
[Bridge to Admiral Lassiter.]
Gem's eyes snapped open. It took an instant for her to remember where she was, what year it was. She sat up and caught sight of her reflection in the mirror on the opposite wall, and quickly, it all came back to her.
This was 2389.
The gray hair framing her features and the lines deeply etched into the skin at the corners of her eyes indicated that she was in her 'proper' time; not on a Jump.
She raised her hand and touched the tips of her fingers to her face. The sensation of the action was in perfect synchronization with the image in the glass, reinforcing that she was the woman staring back from it.
Only after the second request for her attention was she able to find her voice and respond. "Go ahead."
[We're being hailed by Commander Lair Kellyn. She's aboard the USS Alchemy and demanding to speak with you immediately.]
"Lair? Are you certain?" Gem's heart rate increased and she suddenly felt short of breath.
If Zanh had given command of the Alchemy to Lair of all people, that meant that the situation back at the Zenith's last known location had gone from worse to disastrous.
[Yes, Admiral, we're certain. Would you like to beam over or should we connect her via secure channel to your quarters?]
"Here," she responded. "Lassiter out." She struggled to stand on tremulous legs, and staggered toward the desk. She slumped down into the chair, folded her hands on the shiny surface of the desktop, and waited.
-=USS Alchemy; Fifteen minutes later=-
Jariel returned to the bridge to check up on things, and found that Lair had already finished her conversation with Admiral Lassiter and immediately disappeared into the small adjacent ready room.
That was where he found her, still pacing and muttering to herself when he finally gave up ringing the chime and entered without her prior consent.
"Damn that woman. She's not willing to risk Starfleet's sterling reputation even to save eight hundred people? Not to save even her own son?" Kellyn stopped before the desk and looked down at a small picture that sat there. It was an image of Zanh and her husband, captured only recently and installed here at the Captain's request.
She picked the frame up and held it in her hands, completely unaware that she was no longer alone.
"What would you do if you were in my place, Zanh Liis?"
"It doesn't matter what Zanh Liis would do." Jariel approached and gently took the frame from her grasp, returning it to its proper location. "What is Lair Kellyn going to do? After all, she is the one in command of this ship, you know."
Lair ground her teeth again and shook her head from side to side. "I know. And I also know what I want to do. But you see, there's this little problem with that. A matter concerning a direct order I'm supposed to follow."
"I hate those."
"Me too. You have no idea how much I've come to hate those." Kellyn moved toward the viewport and allowed her head to drop into her hands.
"I take it that Admiral Lassiter denied the Captain's request for more ships," Jariel surmised.
"Turned us down flat. I don't understand it, Jariel. This is the brand new flagship we're talking about. Her entire crew, not to mention the Sera's crew is now clearly in danger as well. You'd think that they'd be willing to send every ship in the fleet to stop anyone else from being lost. Even if." She left her thought unfinished, not wanting to complete it.
"Even if the Zenith's crew cannot be recovered."
Lair nodded.
"Well, I can't tell you to disobey a direct order from Starfleet. We both know what the consequences will be if you do."
"Then tell me this, Jariel. How will I live with the consequences of what is going to happen if I don't?"
Jariel folded his hands together and inhaled slowly. He held the breath a moment before releasing it and parting his lips again to speak. "I know a woman," he began, the spark of memory lighting his deep brown eyes with a glow she'd seldom seen, "who once disobeyed a direct order and took on an entire ship full of Borg to save one man. A woman who has always charged head first into the fight, any fight, whenever she had to, to protect the people she loved."
"And damn the repercussions." Kellyn couldn't admit to him that she feared that the woman who had done those things might not exist any longer.
"Precisely." Jariel reached into his pocket and pulled out a small item. He regarded it a moment before he held it out toward her. "If that woman clears her mind and truly considers her options, she will have absolutely no problem coming up with the answer. She will know exactly what it is she has to do and how she'll live with the outcome, whatever that is."
Kellyn glanced up as the light bouncing off the item he held in his hand caught her attention. "What's that?"
"Your daughter asked me to bring this to you. To her mother, the 'current Commanding Officer of the USS Alchemy'."
"For about another five minutes before I get myself court-martialed, you mean." Kellyn sighed as she took it from him. She saw that it was a small, beaded pendant suspended from a length of dark elastic cord. It was a necklace, made of wire bent into the shape of the Starfleet insignia and embellished as only a child could with bright blue and crystal clear beads.
The 'art-project' that Fleur had overseen had apparently been taken very seriously by her very intense young daughter.
"She asked me to tell you something." Jariel added, already turning and heading for the door.
"What's that?"
"That she is proud of you and that she knows that you will take care of everything."
Kellyn's knees suddenly felt like they'd turned to jelly.
As the doors shut behind Jariel, she sank to the deck.
She leaned against the wall, closed her eyes, and began to pray.
She didn't know if anyone was listening, and anyway she wasn't really making a request for help or guidance. She was making a request for strength to do what she knew she had to do now, and a plea in advance for forgiveness if it turned out that she was making the biggest mistake of her life.
She stared down at the necklace Arie had made for her with such care, and slowly she slipped it on over her head. It came to rest against her chest, and she tucked it inside of the collar of her uniform.
Then she drew a long breath, steeled herself, and rose.
Without a moment's hesitation, she walked out onto the bridge and addressed the assembled company, which included a very pensive Vedek Jariel Camen.
"I'm about to commit a direct violation of our orders." Lair announced, taking the time to meet each person's eyes as they probed hers for answers. "If anyone has any problem with that, just say the word and I will put you off the ship at the first opportunity with those who need a safe place to go."
"This...won't be a safe place anymore?" Samson asked nervously.
"No it won't Micah." Kellyn answered honestly. As his expression asked her why, she continued without taking another breath. "Because I'm about to send the children and any others who want to go...and Lieutenant Grace..." Kellyn rolled her eyes, knowing Bru would not want to leave and may have to be sedated to accomplish the task. "...off onto the first safe ship or port we can find."
"Then what happens?" Dane inquired, intrigued. He had no doubt that whatever Lair had in mind, if it was going to somehow help the Sera's crew, that he was in.
"Then we turn around and go straight back to help our crew, in any way that we can." She reached up and touched the pendant Arie had made her through the fabric of her tunic, patting it gently.
Then she watched as a small smile appeared on Jariel's face, and he nodded to her his approval.
"Anyone wishing to opt out, say so now. Because I am probably about to bring a quick end to my long and colorful Starfleet career, I don't want to take anybody with me unless they're certain they want to go."
"We're a crew." Dane responded, knowing from the look on Gira's face that she had already made up her mind. "We stick together, Sir."
Kellyn's heart sped up. The light returned to her eyes as she finally felt that things were about to start happening. "All right. No one has any objections?"
"I do." A voice from the back of the bridge spoke up and a lone man stepped forward. "If you plan to violate the direct orders of both Captain Zanh and Admiral Lassiter, I'll be forced to do everything in my power to try to stop you."
"Who the hell are...oh. It's only you." Kellyn frowned, looking over to see Lieutenant Elliot Talbot had turned three different, gradient shades of the color red at hearing her last three words. "Talbot I don't have time to debate the ethics of this decision with you. I'm in command here, and I'm ordering this ship back to the front. I'll ask you one more time. Will you follow my orders?"
Talbot smugly folded his arms and smirked the most self-righteous, pompous looking expression Lair had ever seen. "No, I will not, Lair Kellyn. I want you to leave me out of this. Send me away with the rest of the passengers."
Lair was, however, too smart to fall for this.
She knew the instant he had the opportunity, he'd tell their superiors what she was planning to do. "Have it your way. I'll leave you out of it." She inclined her head towards Dane.
"Mister Cristiane?"
"Yes, Sir."
"Secure Lieutenant Talbot in the brig and leave him there until further notice."
The smug smile vanished from Talbot's face as Dane quickly drew his phaser, and a similar expression instantly appeared upon his face instead. "Yes, Sir."
"Are you entirely certain of this?" Jariel whispered in her ear, even as Talbot was led away, still complaining loudly that Lair would 'get hers'. "This really could mean the end of your career, Kellyn."
"Better an end to my career than to have to live with my conscience later if I don't do what I know I have to do to save our family back there." Kellyn said, and with a heaviness in her heart that made all around her seem capable of dragging her down, she again took up the Captain's chair. "Micah, since Dane is busy I need you to do some shopping for me."
"Shopping, Sir?"
"Yes. For a place to park our passengers."
------------------------
Commander Lair Kellyn
Starfleet Research and Development
Currently in command of the USS Alchemy
Commander Lair Kellyn
Starfleet Research and Development
Currently in command of the USS Alchemy