593: Irish Eyes

by Lt. CMDR Azalea Adams
Former CMO of the USS Perseids
81017.16
During Best Days


-----------------------

-=Illusions Lounge=-

Captain O'Sullivan stepped up to the bar and asked for another two glasses of sparkling water. One for himself and one for Zanh Liis. Her throat was dry, her voice hoarse from countermanding statements made by Ashton Ledbetter every time he tried to tell a story about one of their past Jumps together.

"Well well, here's the man himself."

A tall, elegant looking woman marched up behind him. For a second he almost didn't recognize her.

It wasn't just that she had forgone wearing her uniform, most of the Perseids crew with but a few exceptions had done that tonight.

It was the weary, troubled expression on her face that made her seem so different to him.

"K.O. you look fine this evening in that suit." A far cry from the man she had ever only seen wear two things; his uniform, or a pair of faded jeans and a button down shirt.

"Thanks 'Zalea. So do you. Wearin' red at that..."

"Closest I'll ever get to Command colors, I figure."

Keiran laughed heartily. "Don't bet on that, no? Somehow I believe that you can have absolutely an'a'thing you put that mind to."

She shrugged, but Keiran would not tolerate her over-modesty. Not tonight, not when he would likely never have another chance to tell her how much her work had meant to himself and the crew over those two years of non-linear time.

"Doctor Adams," he began slowly, "Might I get you a drink and chat at you awhile?"

"Would be grand." She playfully used his favorite word to describe something that pleased him, and Keiran smiled.

"Red wine for the lady," He requested, remembering her beverage of choice.

He had come to know quite a lot about Azalea Adams, but not so much as she had come to know about him.

Adams had been the only medical officer aboard the Perseids for their entire trip; with the obvious exception of the EMH.

But this particular medical hologram had such an awful personality profile thanks to her programmers that the entire crew threatened mutiny if she were activated on a regular basis.

Therefore, Adams often worked late into the nights patching up the crew physically, and more often emotionally.

Having earned a double doctorate in medicine and psychology, she had been both physician and counselor to the crew.

With so many TI agents in the same place who had previously been part of individual Jump teams before being put together in this first-of-its-kind Jump Crew, she had heard and seen it all during her time with them.

Three members of the crew had suffered full-blown nervous breakdowns during her tenure. One attempted suicide, and she was only barely able to revive him.

That had been one of the darkest days she could remember and hoped that tomorrow, she would forget.

She couldn't wait for the resequencing this time.

She had been a nervous wreck since they'd woken up aboard the Serendipity, and was very anxious for the procedure to remove the visions she kept reliving from the paradox.

Burying Keiran had been especially traumatic for her.

As his main confidant and the person charged with keeping him in one piece so he could lead them all, having lost him the way that they had, on the bridge no less, had been something she didn't believe she could ever get over.

"Give me one second, be right back. Grab a table?" Keiran took Zanh's glass to her and whispered in her ear. She nodded, and thanked him for the drink.

Adams observed him closely as he interacted with her. She was, after all, more than a little curious about the woman.

All evening, the captain of the Sera had declined to share any Jump stories of her own with the assembled celebrators. Her body language changed as the night wore on, and spoke louder than any words could. Her posture struck Adams as the mark of a fiercely private and guarded person.

Oh, Zanh seemed willing to chime in a detail here or there to a story she was part of when asked and able. What was more, she had no problem 'correcting' the living hell out of Ash Ledbetter.

Regardless of her initial impression that Zanh was both complicated and hard to get to know, given what Keiran had told her in the past Azalea was very glad that the two of them had found their way back to each other.

She only hoped it could last.

In her job she saw many marriages fail due to baggage carried over from Temporal Investigations. Even after the agent left the work behind. In fact, she had done studies on this phenomenon for the Department and case history after case history painted a grim picture when even one of the two in a marriage had been TI.

When both had, it spelled almost certain doom. Too many fractured memories, and personality traits.

Too many broken souls.

She continued to watch Keiran as he came back toward her, and she simply marveled at the man. He'd been so patient, through so much just waiting for the chance to find this one woman again. It was truly something.

She found herself wondering if she would ever be as fortunate as Zanh Liis.

She had no doubt that if any man could pull off breaking that TI curse and building a strong marriage after retirement, it would be the man she affectionately referred to as K.O.

He returned to her at the table and took a seat, setting her glass of wine down before her. "There you are."

"Thank you." She took a sip and then gestured with her glass toward Zanh. "She's as lovely as you described her, Captain. Congratulations."

"Aye. Thanks very much." Keiran's cheeks took on a color that she'd never seen. He folded his hands on the surface of the table and glanced at her sideways. "I still can't believe I'm in the same room with her. I really thought,"

Adams knew exactly what he'd thought.

-=Flashback: USS Perseids=-

The ship had only been out for a week.

In the course of mandatory physical examinations, Adams finally managed to corner the Captain for a check-up.

"That can't be right." She pondered the reading with disbelief.

"What now?"

"Your weight. Comparing this to the physical you had aboard the USS Serendipity just three weeks ago, it says you've lost..." her eyes widened as she did the math quickly in her head. "nine kilograms."

"Yeah. Well." Keiran shrugged. This was not news to him. His clothes were falling off, and he'd finally been forced to replicate new uniforms.

"You are aware of this?"

Again he shrugged.

"Have you been on a diet? Your starting weight was just about perfect, so you really didn't need to take any off you know."

"I know. Haven't been tryin' to."

"In that case, I'm going to have to run a full battery of tests to determine why you've experienced such a sudden drop." She announced, firing up the overhead panel and pulling out another tricorder.

"From the report of the doctors on the Serendipity, nothing you experienced there, bad as it was, accounts for this. We'll start with blood work,"

"Doctor," he raised his hand slowly. "No need. I, I know exactly what's ailin' me. I'll...be all right. Given time."

She frowned at him and put her hand on her hip. "Captain O'Sullivan, I regret to inform you that is not a satisfactory answer. If you can't tell me exactly why you have lost nine kilograms in barely three weeks, then I'm going to have to insist upon the tests."

"Tell me, Doctor Adams, can you see a broken heart on those scan of yours?" He asked softly, wringing his hands. "'Cause if not, you're wastin' your time. No point in lookin' for an'a'thin' else."

"Oh. I see." She set her medical devices aside, and hopped up onto the biobed next to him. Casually, she swung her feet to and fro. "Left someone behind?"

"Not by choice, believe me. If it'd been up to me, I'd never be without her again." He closed his eyes, his head dropping into his hand.

"Was she a member of the crew of the Serendipity?"

"Could say that." Keiran droned. "Captain of. So."

Adams was glad he wasn't paying attention and didn't see the look in her eyes. She'd heard the name of the Captain of the Serendipity before, and Zanh Liis had a reputation among Temporal Investigations agents as a woman to be taken very seriously.

"So you've seen her recently."

"Aye." Keiran replied sadly, finally uncovering his face. "But feels like it's been forever since."

She put her hand on his shoulder. "Have you been getting any sleep?"

Keiran frowned at her as if to say the answer should be obvious, given the circles under his eyes. But she hadn't known him long enough to judge by his appearance alone that something was deeply troubling him.

"What can I do for you?" she asked, "would it help more to talk about her, or to leave the subject alone for now?"

"Actually..." He was unable to believe he was saying this. "Might help, to get some of it out of my head. If you...don't mind takin' the time."

"That's what I'm here for." She hopped back up, finished scanning him and tapped her notes into the computer.

"The rest of your health profile is pretty good, considering all you went through during your stay on the Sera. They really put some mileage on you around there. Please do me a favor and try not to get shot or mentally hijacked by any alien species for awhile?" She smiled gently.

She noticed again a different sort of sorrow displaying on his face, and felt the need to prod him again for an answer as to what it meant. "Captain?"

"'Tis just that, if our mission goes right..." he looked at her with a combination of dread and sadness, "then we'll be meetin' up with those very same aliens again before we can go home."

-=End Flashback=-

Many times he had come to her and spoken of Zanh, the alternate timelines and the consequences of the Sylph intervention.

She knew how much Keiran had hoped to find his way back to Zanh someday. She was relieved to see that despite the disparity between how much time had passed for him as opposed to the object of his affection while they'd been 'away', it appeared the woman had no doubt about her feelings toward him.

"Hey you, awake over there?" Keiran waved a hand teasingly in front of her blank stare. "Makes a man nervous, when his counselor goes all quiet on him."

"I'm not your counselor anymore. Just your friend. Have you contacted your family yet? I bet they were overjoyed that both you and Carrick are all right."

"I spoke to both Cleary and Mary Clare earlier this evenin'," Keiran spoke of the one of his brothers closest in age to him, and the very youngest of all of his siblings.

"News from home good?"

"Most." Keiran began swirling his glass slowly, watching the ice move in circles a moment before taking a drink.

"The rest?"

"My father is doing poorly." He confided. "He's had to be put into an assisted care facility. Just too hard on my sisters to care for him now. He's too stubborn, won't listen to an'a'body."

"Imagine that! A stubborn O'Sullivan man." She gave him a wry smile, but it faded. "I'm sorry to hear about your Dad."

"Well, my brothers and sisters all have families and obligations of their own. Well, you know Mary Clare doesn't have a family as such but her duties as a Sister keep her very busy. Da is too ill, was a danger to himself, left alone. Has to be this way."

"But you still hate it."

"Damn right." Keiran was wondering even now how he would stand the sight of his father in such condition when he went to see him. Soon.

"Will your family be able to attend the wedding?"

His expression brightened. "Better than that. Mary Clare is taking care of several things I asked her help for. Sure'n she was shocked when I announced I was gettin' married though. Her expression was this, right?" Keiran dropped his mouth open and widened his eyes as large as he could in example.

"She was screamin' so loud into the subspace transmitter that Father Quinn came in to see what she was wailin' about."

She nodded and sipped her wine. "So you're going to be married in Ireland?"

"Aye. Still feels like home." He his eyes returned to Zanh. "For us both."

She understood him to mean they would marry at the precise location where their home had been previously, in the time that was long gone.

"Will you be rebuilding on the same land?" Part of her worried that if he did, the memories of the other lines would be too difficult to live with.

Another part of her wished that he would, though, because she so much preferred to think of him living there, happily, than being buried there. *Of course, tomorrow, I won't remember either outcome...*

"Keep a secret?" Keiran's eyes lit up, and he leaned close in over the table. He waited for her to signal her agreement before continuing. "Already did."

"No!"

"Yeah!" He mimicked her tone and posture and again, she smiled. "My brothers, you know, they're all in the building trades. This is what they do for a livin', and so before I left, I asked them to take the plans I'd been working on late at nights when I couldn't sleep, and make them into a reality."

"But you didn't think you were coming home." She was puzzled. "You thought the Jump would be one way for you."

"Aye."

"Then why build the house? For Carrick?"

"No, he won't stay in Ireland. I know that."

"Then..."

He tilted his head, bright blue eyes sparkling intensely as he again stared across the room at Zanh. "For her. So she'd always have a home to go to, no matter what."

Adams felt a lump catch in her throat. *Yes,* she thought, *If any man can break the curse that TI puts on marriage, it'll be this one.*

"That's wonderful, Captain. How's construction coming along?"

"Well, with three brothers in the business pooling their resources and allocating their work crews to help their crazy Starfleet brother out of a jam..." he shook his head, in amazement, still speaking softly as he could amidst the noise so as not to be overheard. "They tell me that the keys are waitin'. Can't wait to see the look on her face."

"Remarkable." Considering how little time had passed for those in the linear timeline since Keiran had left Earth, that was truly something.

"To be sure. Happened to be their slow season. For once, my timing was impeccable."

His jaw clenched suddenly, as he considered the new house and compared it in his mind to the one that had existed in the past.

"It'll be different than before. A hell of a lot different."

"In what way?"

"''Tis made to withstand severe, hurricane force winds. Also has a storm cellar."
She tried to hide her reaction as tears formed behind her eyes. She remembered how he told her that Zanh had died in a previous timeline after a storm brought their house down around her.

"She won't know at first by lookin' at it. Was just something I had to do for myself." He added. "But I bet I know what her new favorite thing will be."

"What's that?"

"A circular tower I added, with windows all 'round to give her a three-hundred and sixty degree view of our land. On the main floor will be a library and office for my wife..." He said the last two words breathlessly, with great reverence. "With all the necessities for a Starfleet Captain on holiday.

"A spiral staircase leads up to the master bedroom suite. 'Tis a dormer room with vaulted ceilings. Wide open space for her, after spending so much of her life either crammed aboard small ships or in that orphanage on Bajor."

He dearly hated to think of Zanh's childhood. As brave as she was when she spoke of it, it still hurt him to think of her ever going without anything she needed.

"An'away, I hope we'll be able to go home and stay awhile, at least once a year. Rest of the time, Cleary will look after the place for us. His land is the next parcel over from ours."

"Holiday?" Adams was surprised. "You're not both going to retire from the fleet after your wedding?"

"No," he shook his head, watching Zanh closely. "I couldn't ask her to do that, 'Zalea. She's still got too much to do here. And I'm goin' to do ev'ry'thin' I can to help."

Azalea smiled.

"And what about you, then, Doc? Are you going to accept reassignment or are you finally done with this lunacy?"

She considered his question carefully. She didn't quite now how to tell him the answer to his question, afraid to disappoint him.

"I'm..." Keiran took note of the change in her demeanor and immediately reached out and patted her hand as it shook against the table top.

"Hey now, what's all this then?"

"I'm done. This resequencing will be my last, if I can help it." She bit her lip, "Are you disappointed in me?"

"You're joking, yeah?"

She shook her head and fought the threat of tears as best she could.

"Hell no, Azalea, I am not disappointed in you." He pulled a linen handkerchief from his breast pocket and gave it to her. "You have given everything you had away for as long as I've known you. Somehow, I have a feelin' that was not a habit you just happened to pick up when you were assigned to the Persey.

"If I were a bettin' man I'd wager you've been doin' it your whole life, no?" His voice was low and reassuring. "Time for you to take care of yourself. 'Tis a loss for TI to be sure, but I hope it will be all gain for you."

He patted her hand once again. "Any idea what you'd like to do with the rest of your life?"

"In fact, I think I'm going to go with the Starfleet Physician's Volunteer Corps. I've already put in the request, in case I don't remember after the resequencing."

He knew, sadly, that she was not joking. It was entirely possible that afterward she might not even remember what she wanted to do with the rest of her life.

"Really? Where'bouts?"

"To your fiancée's homeworld." She used the term specifically, just so she could observe the smile it would bring to his face. Sure enough, it worked like a charm.

She sipped her wine again.

"The Takesian Plains to be precise. From what I hear Starfleet is seeking to ramp up their show of support there, and one thing they desperately need is doctors and counselors."

"I do admire ya, doctor. But then, I always have. You have done more for me and for our crew than I could ever thank you for. I only wish that," his eyes glistened. "You could be there to see me finally get my fondest wish of all."

"Me too, K.O." She squeezed his hand. "Me too."

Keiran sighed.

He knew that he had others he had to talk to here as well tonight, and so sadly had to bring their conversation to a close.

He stood up slowly and offered her his hand again for a formal shake.

"You're a hell of a doctor, Azalea Adams, and a hell of a woman. Just do me a favor, yeah? Be sure that while you're out savin' the worlds that you take time to save yourself."

Tears appeared again suddenly and quickly rolled down her cheeks. "How do you know that I need saving?"

"That look in the eyes. You know, the one I had when we first had that conversation about Zanh Liis, ages ago?" he answered. "I see it in your eyes now, and I know it well enough. I saw it in the mirror every damned day for too many years to count."

A final time, her vision locked with his and she was held transfixed by those familiar, piercing blue eyes. She would miss those eyes so much, she found that there was nothing she could say.

"If...you should happen to remember an'a'thing about me," his voice threatened to break as he thought of yet another friendship he would be losing come tomorrow, "remember that I'll always be your friend, and if you ever need anything within my power."

She nodded, tears still blurring her vision as he slowly walked away.

She fought them, wanting to see him clearly and keep the image of him with her as long as she could. He amazed her until the last as he put his brave face back on and approached the crowd at the center of the room with a broad, warm grin.

She wondered if he realized just how hard every single person in the room was working to keep as brave a face on, for his sake, until the very end.

--------------------------
Lt. Commander Azalea Adams
Starfleet Medical/Temporal Investigations