80710.00
Afternoon, the day after the Alchemy's departure
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-=Crew Quarters=-
Jariel Camen peered into the closet where his clothes were hung for the trip to Betazed, and he stared at the duffle on the floor near them.
He had heard nothing from Zanh Liis in the 24 hours since he had boarded the Alchemy. Supposedly she was spending her time in deuterium control. Wherever she was there was no doubt why she was there. She wanted to be left alone.
Jariel was now the one playing the dangerous 'what if' game that O'Sullivan had played before. What if she did remember? What if she wanted to stay with him? What if she was only here because she thought that was what Camen wanted, not because it was what she wanted?
If she returned to him, would it be of her own free will, or merely to patronize him so he wouldn't be upset? Such a fate would be worse than watching her walk away.
*Maybe I should just pack the bag, and when we get to Betazed, I can disappear on the next transport to Bajor. Then she won't have to stay here out of a feeling of guilt.*
Jariel had it all planned out in his mind. He'd leave her a note saying he wouldn't stand in her way of finding happiness, and she could live out the great Irish love story.
He was sure Liis would be thrilled if he took Le Marc along with him, but Jariel had only one issue with that.
He didn't love Fleur.
Of course, it was all absurd. Liis didn't remember anything that had happened. He sighed heavily and flopped backwards onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling. What he wouldn't give to really know what was going through her mind at this moment.
The chime rang and for an instant all his insecurity faded away.
In his mind the door opened, Liis was standing there smiling, and would throw her arms around him.
In reality, when he called for enter, it was not Zanh Liis, but rather February Grace that stood in the doorway.
"Oh, hello February."
"May I come in?" She said with a smile.
"Of course." Jariel returned to the bed and staring at the ceiling. February sat on the small chair across the tiny quarters, only a few feet away.
"We're all pretty worried about the Captain, how is she?"
[[Your guess is as good as mine,]] He signed.
"You haven't spoken to her?" She asked, sounding surprised.
[[She hasn't spoken to me.]] Jariel corrected.
"Oh." If February had come here for reassurance about the health of Zanh Liis, the first few moments here had had only the opposite effect. "Would you like to talk about why?" She offered.
[[I couldn't discuss it even if I wanted to, and even if I wanted to I'd still need to know why it is she won't speak to me before I could discuss it.]]
February found his line of reasoning very Rada Dengar in nature. Completely logical, and yet entirely cryptic.
"Well if she won't talk to you, you need to seek her out."
[[If she wanted my presence, she would be here. I'm not going to push her.]]
February shook her head. "If Dabin and I had taken that approach, he would have wound up leaving the ship and me behind all those months ago."
[[February,]] Camen sighed, [[Zanh Liis makes it perfectly clear when she needs space. If she needs space its because she wants to sort things out in her head.]]
"I know," She admitted, "You don't need to go running to her now, but at some point. Certainly by the time we reach Betazed. The longer you wait the more whatever is bothering her is going to eat away at her."
*Eat away.* Camen thought, as he sat up and looked back at the duffle laying on the floor. [[I know what it feel like to have something eat away at you.]] The mere thought that she may be in love with Keiran now and not him had been eating away at him for days.
February turned and saw the empty bag at the base of the closet, and the color drained from her face.
"You've thought about leaving, haven't you?"
Camen was an honest man, and his silence indicated that he could not lie to her, but he didn't want to tell the truth.
February stood up, taking on as animated a tone as he could ever remember from her.
"Look, I don't know what you think is wrong with the Captain, but you need to pull yourself together. I don't know her as well as you but I know when I have seen a woman in love and I know there is no force in this Universe that could ever compel her to want you to leave. Unless, it’s you that wishes to leave?"
"Certainly not." He said out loud, the very idea hurtful to him.
"Then don't even consider running away. If you love her, she's worth fighting for! Give her some space if you must, but shore leave is the perfect time and place to talk with her."
[[But how? I don't want to drive her even farther away. If I press her,]]
"You'll know the right time when it comes. Maybe it will just fall in your lap."
Camen nodded slowly, knowing she was right. She sat back down in her chair.
[[February?]]
"Yes?"
[[When did you become the Chaplain?]]
"When the person who is always trying to help everyone else needed help himself. I don't know if I helped at all, but if I did, I only owe you about a dozen more."
Camen suddenly felt overwhelmed with exhaustion. Perhaps he could finally sleep for a little while now, before he was due to show up at the party the crew had planned for this evening.
He thanked February for her kindness, and she left.
Camen started to drift to sleep, then suddenly sat upright in bed. He leapt up, and grabbed the duffle of the floor. Wadding it up into a ball, he crammed it as far into the back of the closet as he could, and shut the door.
This was no time for sleep. He needed to talk a walk, clear his head, and come up with a plan.
Outside the room, February tapped her Comm badge.
"Grace to Tryst."
[Go ahead.] Came a rather solemn reply.
"Can you recommend a romantic place to eat on Betazed?"
[Versina is considered one of the most beautiful places on the planet. The sunlight scatters off the surrounding crystals in the mountains to project all the colors of the spectrum onto the people below.]
February sensed Vol's appreciation for the place, even though romantic dinners seemed to be far from the forefront of his mind at the moment.
"That’ll do. Thank you."
As she closed the channel, she arrived at the door to her quarters. She stepped through, and Reece greeted her with a smile.
*I need your help. * She thought.
*With what? * He asked.
*Making some reservations. *
Jariel Camen
Ship's Chaplain
USS Serendipity/Alchemy